Wish You Were Here
by Fafsernir
Summary: Ianto usually tried not to think too much about his situation, but sometimes he realised that his life was heading nowhere. [Day 3 of "7 days/7 fics"]


_A quick explanation of this:_ 8 days - 8 fics _is a challenge we created with a friend. Basically, for 8 days, I'll be writing a fic a day (based on 10 days / 10 songs by PV Nova, a french youtuber/musician) with conditions we came up with and that I pick randomly each day. Even if the fics are part of the same challenge, they can all be read apart, nothing connect them. Now, it's called 7 days 7 fics on FF because one of the days was about OCs, but I won't be posting this on ._

 _Today's conditions were:_ Prompt " _Now, not to be forward, but I love you._ _"_ \- Fandom _Torchwood_ \- Category _Angst_ _-_ Imposed word _hat (_ suggested by a friend)

 _I'm sorry if it's short/not so good, but I've spent the day looking for a flat so I'm just really dead tired, and I was very reluctant about writing angst with Torchwood when I haven't written in the fandom for a long time. But that's the game^^_

 _Oh and the title is completely for Pink Floyd's song because I've been listening to them again lately, don't mind me, I was just too lazy to search for a title._

* * *

Ianto closed his eyes, letting the surrounding noises fill his mind, hoping it would help him relax. It worked for a few seconds, then he felt exhaustion wash over any relaxing thoughts. He sighed, thinking about how hard work had become. They were only three to handle a job that had already been a bit out of control when there were five of them, and Ianto single handled most of it. Not that the other two were doing nothing, but Jack relied on him for a lot of things, and Gwen still had enough free time to go on dates and have a married life.

Sometimes, Ianto just felt lonely, both in his job and his life. And Jack didn't help. Since Tosh and Owen had died, he was either almost too much involved in their relationship, or he distanced himself suddenly for no apparent reason. Ianto couldn't know in which mood he was beforehand, and he sometimes found himself alone when he wished Jack was here.

It sure didn't help that his feelings for the other man were growing, despite himself. He had thought a lot about not letting himself fall for Jack, but he didn't really see the point. Either way, he was hurting, and he would probably die with the job. And with the free time he had – almost none – he wasn't going to meet anyone new, certainly not someone to be romantically involved with, so why not fall for Jack? At least he already was having sex with him, going on dates with him... Were they living together, too? Jack spent a lot of time in his flat, at least.

"Hey," a voice said behind him. He turned his head, smiling over his shoulder at Gwen, then looking at the water in front of him. "Rhys is going to pick me up soon, and I saw you brooding, I thought you might appreciate the company."

"I'm not brooding."

"Oh yeah, and what are you doing then?" she smiled, nudging him as she leaned against the rail, mirroring his position.

"I'm... thinking."

"About really happy thoughts?"

"Okay, you got me," he smiled, glancing at her. "So, how's the husband?"

 _Husband_. Sometimes, he was jealous of what Gwen had outside Torchwood. At least, she was sure of her feelings for Rhys, and most importantly, she was sure of Rhys' feelings.

"Complaining about my job, for a change," she shook her head.

"He's just worried."

"I know, I understand." There was a silence, then she sighed. "Ianto, are you sure you're okay?" she asked, putting a comforting hand on his arm.

He smiled reassuringly, nodding as he looked at her in the eyes. "I'm fine."

She rolled her eyes, but didn't say anything about his lie. Instead, she turned to the water, clasping her hands together and playing with her fingers. "Do you... Do you ever imagine that they're still here?" she asked hesitantly.

He knew she was speaking about Tosh and Owen, and he looked away. "Sometimes," he admitted. "I didn't think I'd ever miss Owen's sarcastic remarks, but I do," he tried to laugh, but it died before it was even entirely out.

"I miss not understanding a word of what Tosh said," she smiled.

"Right," he chuckled, remembering fondly his late best friend. He missed her so much. They had become really close, and they had long spent hours talking. Now, most of his free evenings or nights were spent lying on his bed, trying to sleep more than three hours a night. He usually just stared at his ceiling or buried his head in paperwork.

Gwen put her arm around his, offering a quiet support. They stayed silent, both remembering their friends, until Rhys called his wife. She grinned instantly, suddenly looking happy, before she even turned completely.

"Don't overthink," she smiled at Ianto, kissing his cheek before joining Rhys.

He waved at Ianto, and readjusted the hat he was wearing on his head. Ianto waved back and stared, amused, when Gwen looked hesitant.

"What's that?" he heard her ask.

"My colleagues offered it to me! They thought hats suited me. And it does, doesn't it?"

"Huh..." Gwen thought, then put her arms around his waist. "Now, not to be forward, but I love you."

Rhys kissed her, but pulled back, holding her by the shoulders. "That doesn't answer the question."

"Doesn't it?" she asked innocently.

"You don't like it, do you?" he sighed dramatically.

"Nope," she shook her head, determined.

He stared at her, then cracked a smile. "That's what I've been saying to my colleagues, I just wanted to get your reaction," he laughed, kissing her. He took her hand and finally walked away from the water, chatting and laughing with her.

Ianto watched them leave, feeling jealousy slowly building up. He was jealous of what they had, probably simply because he knew he would never have it. He was pretty sure that he could quit and walk away from all of it and that Jack would let him, but he had realised a long time ago that he would never be able to walk away from that job. That was the curse of the Torchwood employees. They never simply and willingly walked out of it. With a bit of luck, they got a funeral, but that was rare.

"Ianto, weevil sighting," Jack's voice suddenly interrupted his thoughts.

He walked past him without really glancing at him and Ianto automatically followed him. He was stuck with this. While other couples went out to dinner, relaxed together, or just hanged out, he and Jack ran the street after aliens. Not that they were a couple, even if sometimes Ianto wished they were. He wished some things were simpler between him and Jack. His life was already too complicated by itself.

At least, he had someone. That was what he tried to focus on when he really couldn't take it anymore.


End file.
